When you’ve ls’d, grepped, catted, piped and tailed everything on your computer and there is absolutely nothing left to do, there’s always this…

# Have EPEL and then do:
yum -y install figlet fortune cowsay

And here it comes…

cowsay -f $(ls `cowsay -l | grep "^Cow files" | awk '{print $NF}' | awk -F':' '{print $1}'` | sort -R | head -1) "$(date +'%A, %B %d, %Y' ; echo '' ; mdadm --detail /dev/md[0-9] | egrep "^\/|Raid |State.*:|Size|Status" ; echo '--------------------------------------' ; fortune -s)"
 _________________________________________
/ Sunday, March 29, 2015                  \
|                                         |
| /dev/md0:                               |
|                                         |
| Raid Level : raid10                     |
|                                         |
| Array Size : 7813360640 (7451.40 GiB    |
| 8000.88 GB)                             |
|                                         |
| Used Dev Size : 3906680320 (3725.70 GiB |
| 4000.44 GB)                             |
|                                         |
| Raid Devices : 4                        |
|                                         |
| State : active, checking                |
|                                         |
| Chunk Size : 512K                       |
|                                         |
| Check Status : 61% complete             |
| --------------------------------------  |
| One does not thank logic.               |
|                                         |
| -- Sarek, "Journey to Babel", stardate  |
\ 3842.4                                  /
 -----------------------------------------
      \                _
       \              (_)
        \   ^__^       / \
         \  (oo)\_____/_\ \
            (__)\       ) /
                ||----w ((
                ||     ||>>

When I was younger, I thought this was immature and silly, but now I grok the purpose. Anyone can check on the state of a logical disk. Not everyone can have a talking cow deliver a concise status of a RAID device and follow it up with a pearl of Vulcan wisdom while being sodomized by a stick man.

Damn, it’s late. Many meetings in the morning. Don’t be upset with people calling the meetings. But definitely be wary of people who at the end of a meeting say “this was a good meeting”. They should not be allowed to make it back to their desk. And I should probably be going to sleep…